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Recommended Reading List

The books listed below in alphabetic order are some of our favorites that we have used
in our marriage ministry. They are in a bibliography format, with links to Amazon.com so
you can read the book reviews, or write your own book review.  You can also order either
new or used copies of the book.  We have ordered used copies of various books for
substantially less than the new price. Dick is adding COMMENTS in red regarding our
use of the book and what he likes about it.
 

An Empty Cradle, A Full Heart - Reflections For Mothers And Fathers After Miscarriage,
Stillbirth, or Infant Death - by Christine O'Keeffe Lafser
Published by Loyola Press, ISBN 0-8294-1173-9.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0829411739/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

Boundaries - When to Say YES, When to Say NO, To Take Control of Your Life - by Dr Henry Cloud &
Dr John Townsend,
Published by Zondervan, ISBN 0-310-24745-4.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0310247454/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Every young married couple should read this if your parents are trying to manipulate
you by laying guilt trips on you.

Breast Cancer Husband - How To Help Your Wife (And Yourself) Through Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond,
by Marc Silver,
Published by Rodale, ISBN 1-57954-833-4.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1579548334/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This book provided excellent information to help me ride this emotional roller coaster with my wife.

Boundaries in Marriage - It Takes Two To Become One - by Dr Henry Cloud & Dr John Townsend
Published by Zondervan, ISBN 0-310-24314-9.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0310243149/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

Can Stepfamilies Be Done Right? - by Joann & Seth Webster
Published by Creation House Publishers, ISBN 0884196747.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0884196747
/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20
COMMENT:  Alternating chapters by the evil stepmother and the rebellious stepson give you
a great perspective on the issues blended families are experiencing.

The Divorce Remedy - The Proven 7-Step Program For Saving Your Marriage - by Michele Weiner Davis
Published by Simon & Schuster, ISBN 0-684-87354-0.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0684873540/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  If you are willing to work at saving your marriage, and your spouse is not willing
to work at it, this book is for you.

Faithful Attraction, Discovering Intimacy, Love and Fidelity in American Marriage - by Andrew M Greeley
Published by Tom Doherty Associates, ISBN 0-312-85109-X.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=031285109X/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This is the origin of the phrase "Couples that pray together stay together."  See pages 192 & 198

Finding The Love Of Your Life - Ten Principles For Choosing The Right Marriage
Partner - by Neil Clark Warren
Published by Focus On The Family Publishing, ISBN 1-56179-088-5.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1561790885/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Contains excellent self assessments that he incorporated into eHarmony.com

The Five Love Languages - by Gary Chapman
Published by Northfield Publishing, ISBN 1-881273-15-6.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1881273156/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  I always wondered why some people were so crazy over greeting cards and I was not.
This book gave me the answer.  The Love Language assessment is an integral part of our marriage
mentoring process.

The Five Love Languages of Children - by Gary Chapman & Ross Campbell
Published by Northfield Publishing, ISBN 1-881273-65-2.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1881273652/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT: By observing the way our kids act and talk, we can identify their love languages.

For Women Only, What You Need to Know About The Inner Lives of Men - by Shaunti Feldhahn
Published by Multnomah Publishers, ISBN 1-59052-317-2.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1590523172/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Women, if you want to understand how we males think, this is the book to read.

For Men Only:  A Straightforward Guide to The Inner Lives of Women - by Jeff & Shaunti Feldhahn
Published by Multmonah Publishers, ISBN 1590525728.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1590525728/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20/

COMMENT:  Jeff & his wife Shaunti teamed up to help us men understand how women think.

His Needs Her Needs - by Willard F Harley, Jr
Published by Revell, ISBN 0-8007-1788-0.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0800717880/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  The Emotional Needs Questionnaire in Appendix B is excellent.  The companion book,
"Surviving An Affair," goes on the premise that affairs are a result of unmet emotional needs.

How To Avoid Marrying a Jerk - by Dr. John Van Epp
Published by McGraw Hill,  ISBN 0-07-147285-7.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0071472657/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  The Relationship Attachment Model discussed in the book is the best description
I have seen of the bonding factors in a relationship.   Click here to see how we use this model
to make a great case to support sexual abstinence before marriage  
We use his videos in our mentoring of seriously dating couples.

Intended For Pleasure - Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment In Christian Marriage - by
Ed Wheat and Gaye Wheat
Published by Revell, ISBN 0-80071736-8.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0800717368/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Written by a physician who is a Christian, the first few chapters talk about what the Bible
says about sex, then it goes into specific anatomy lessons. We give a copy of this book to every couple
going through marriage preparation mentoring.

Intimate Issues, 21 Questions Christian Women Ask About Sex - by Linda Dillow & Lorraine Pintus
Published by Waterbrook Press, ISBN 1-57856-149-3.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1578561493/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Ladies, you are not the first to ask the question.

The Introvert Advantage-How To Thrive In An Extrovert World - by Marti Olsen Laney
Published by Workman Publishing, ISBN 0-7611-2369-5.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0761123695/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  I'm an introvert and it took me a lifetime to learn these techniques.

Irregular People - by Joyce Landorf Heatherley
Published by Balcony Publishing, ISBN 0-929488-00-8.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0929488008/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This book helped my wife deal with my dad, who was a constant irritation to her.

Is There Really Sex After Kids? - by Jill Savage
Published by Zondervan, ISBN 0-310-23743-2.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0310237432/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

Liberated Through Submission-God's Design For Freedom in All Relationships - by P.B. Wilson
Published by Harvest House Publishers, ISBN 0-89081-843-6.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0890818436/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Pages 68-70 contain the best explanation I have seen for God's job description
for a husband and a wife.

Lies At the Altar - The Truth About Great Marriages - by Dr Robin L. Smith, Published by Hyperion,
ISBN 1-4013-0256-4.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1401302564/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  We mentor many couples who get into trouble in their marriage because they believe the lies Robin describes.  The dialogues she has couples do in her counseling sessions are the same we strive to achieve in our mentor sessions.

Love and Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs - by Emerson Eggerich
Published by Integrity Publishers, ISBN 1591451876.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=1591451876/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20
COMMENT:  This entire book is based on Ephesians 5:33.  And he is right, we males crave respect.
And we won't give love to our wives if we don't feel respected by them.

Making Sense Of The Men In Your Life - by Kevin Leman
Published by Thomas Nelson Publishers, ISBN 0-8407-3494-8.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0840734948/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Chapters 9 and 10 contain the best written male perspective on sex that I have seen.

Marriage Savers - Helping Your Friends and Family Avoid Divorce - by Michael J. McManus
Published by Zondervan, ISBN0-310-38661-6.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0310386616/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This book inspired us to start our marriage ministry.

Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti - by Bill & Pam Farrel
Published by Harvest House Publishers, ISBN 0-7369-0486-7.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0736904867/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  A great explanation of how we males can compartmentalize our thoughts and
why women cannot. Ladies, at times we males CAN be thinking about absolutely nothing.

Personality Plus For Couples - Understanding Yourself and The One You Love - by Florence Littauer
Published by Revell, ISBN 0-8007-5764-5.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0800757645/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

Personality Plus - How To Understand Others By Understanding Yourself - by Florence Littauer
Published by Revell, ISBN 0-8007-5445-X.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=080075445X/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Before reading this book, I thought my wife was doing things just to irritate me or
because she didn't take our relationship seriously. 
We give this book and the assessment to every couple going through the marriage mentoring process.

The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands - by Dr Laura Schlessinger
Puplished by Harper Collins, ISBN 0-06-052061-2.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0060520612/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Dr Laura gives a lot of practical advice (by a woman to women) about how we
males think and act (e.g. On page 119 "Sex is to a husband what conversation is to a wife.")

Sheet Music - Uncovering The Secrets of Sexual Intimacy In Marriage - by Kevin Leman
Published by Tyndale House Publishers, ISBN 0-8423-6024-7.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0842360247/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This book is even better than Making Sense of the Men In Your Life

Surviving An Affair - by Willard Harley & Jennifer Harley Chalmers
Puplished by Revell, ISBN 0-8007-1758-9.  To order from Amazon.com, click on
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0800717589/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  This is the book we use when we mentor couples who are trying to recover from
an affair.  The Policy of Joint Agreement is an integral part of our standard mentoring procedures.

The Sex-Starved Marriage, A Couple's Guide To Boosting Their Marriage Libido - by Michele Weiner Davis
Published by Simon & Schuster, ISBN 0-7432-2732-8.  To order from Amazon.com, click on http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0743227328/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  The author is a marriage therapist, has been married 27 years and has two children. 
This gives her credibility in my eyes.

The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce - A 25 Year Landmark Study - by Judith Wallerstein, Julia
Lewis, and Sandra Blakeslee
Published by Hyperion, ISBN 0-7868-6394-3.  To order from Amazon.com, click on http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN=0786863943/redirect-home/ohiomarriager-20

COMMENT:  Evidence that children of divorce ARE damaged.